Before I grace you with some original Iron Man recipes, I thought I’d share the rest of the world’s edible Iron Man creations.
This caketacular depiction of Iron Man riding a rubber ducky makes me think there must be some kind of extensive fanfic backstory. Wait, it’s hosted on DeviantArt. Change that from “think” to “know.”
While she has a lot of respectable cakes, if you like your geekiness covered in fondant icing, check out Ashlee Trotter’s Angry Birds, Mario, and X-Box cake creations.
In fact, there are a LOT of Iron Man cakes out there. I like the way this one incorporates the feel of a stripper bursting out of a cake alongside the superheroic rush of Tony Stark escaping a Brazillian mudslide without bothering to rescue anyone trapped in the turgid waters below.
For those fondant-o-phobes who prefer icing options that don’t taste like sweetened silly putty, there are even more Iron Man cookies than there are cakes. Of them all, Deviant Artist CookieGeek’s pooh bear trapped in Tony Stark’s armor has a special place in my heart. He looks like he’s about to spend the night telling all the supermodels he wants a little taste of honey.
There are actually some pretty decent looking cookie cutters out there.
Which can look fantastic if carefully and artfully iced.
Or look like the sewer dwelling mutant Morlocks if you ice them while drunk.
Let’s make one thing clear. You may be fascinated by the idea of tasting Iron Man, but much like the contents of Tony Stark’s pants, if you don’t ignore the delicious temptation you’ll regret it when you feel icky later.
Not even this delicious looking bento box is truly safe. Sure, the broccoli and strawberry lure you in with a promise of fiber and antioxidants, but you know you’re just in it for the breaded chicken. Eat the cheese face first lest you be judged by its angry visage.
For that mater, why is the cholesterol-tastic Power Meal only available in the Phillipines? Is piracy so bad you think United Stations are just making thier own Iron Man commemorative posters using photoshop, old comics, and the tears of die hard fans?
Meanwhile, in Egypt, instead of putting a cheap toy in every happy meal they’re giving adults a chance to win a less cheap bit of commemorative goodness. I kind of covet those headphones. Two things in that ad really caught my eye. First, coupons aren’t valid if torn or folded, so make sure you’re extra precise how you carry small slips of cheap paper in the hot Egyptian sun. Second, Egypt has home delivery for fast food burgers?
I’ve never understood why Japan gets things like commemorative movie ramen and we don’t. Is there some great conspiracy to ship mothra eggs to the United States in adorable Japanese food packaging where the larvae can feed on the near sedentary bodies of American animae lovers? If so, why aren’t I in on this?
Speaking of inhuman experiments, I have never seen the Funky Monkey line of Avengers snacks outside a dollar store.
Finally, this picture makes me covet schwarma. It might even make me covet this cosplayer. Either way, he wins at Tony Starkitude.