Indy’s Pull Apart Monkey Brains
3 tubes buttermilk biscuits
1 cup butter
1 cup white sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
3 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp red food coloring
Disposable chopsticks
Use your ritual knife to cleave each biscuit into four parts, mirroring the four lobes of a human heart.
Pour your white sugar and cinnamon into a gallon sized plastic bag. Dump in all the biscuit wedges. Shake the bag like you’re trembling at the feet of a murderous high priest.
Meanwhile, mix the butter and brown sugar in a saucepan. Melt them together until they flow like flesh running off an ark obsessed Nazi’s face.
Divide the mix in half. Add 1 tsp of food coloring to half the mix so it resembles blood. Leave the rest the color of healthy flesh.
Coat the inside of a 1 1/2 quart/6 cup stainless steel mixing bowl with the bloody red butter.
Break two chopsticks in half. Vertically position the four pieces in the middle of the bowl so they create the two lobes of the brain.
Pile the biscuit brain bits into the bowl. Arrange them around the chopsticks so you have a neat vertical line dividing the brain. When the pan is about half full, drench it in bloody butter sauce.
Throw the rest of the biscuit wedges on top of the quivering red mass. Use your palms to pack it all down. Now pour the remaining fleshy colored butter mix on top.
Bake the brain at 350F for 35-40 minutes, or until the top is a dark golden brown.
Let it rest for at least 10 minutes before shaking it loose from the pan. When you slide it out, a little thick red butter blood should dribble down the sides.
Carefully remove the chopsticks, thereby emphasizing the brain’s lobes, and serve alongside a fresh coconut full of Pink Bikini cocktails and promises of your guests impending demise.
