This week, Kitchen Overlord blows the dust off that ancient leather bound tome, ignores the blood stained warnings on the cover, and tries to remember our high school Latin. We’re kicking off our week of H.P. Lovecraft inspired recipes with an edible Necronomicon.
Necronomicon Strawberry Cream Cheese Brownies
By Jennifer Imhoff-Dousharm
A flavor of the law of the dead…. While personally more a fan of the Necronomicon from Army of Darkness, when I came across this menacing version as an e-book reader cover it was just too creepy to not work with!!! A little too creepy. No one in my house is brave enough to make the first cut in fear of waking the beast. The recipe is simple to follow and the design didn’t take long. I used a bamboo stick and small spoon to carve the face. Allowing the brownies to rest overnight allowed the face to really settle in for a good leather look.
Brownie Batter:
10 tbsp Unsalted Butter
1 1/4 cup Sugar
3/4 cups + 2 tbsp Unsweetened Cocoa Powder
1/4 tsp Salt
1 tsp Vanilla
2 large Eggs
1/2 cup Flour
Strawberry Cream Cheese Topping:
8 oz Cream Cheese
1 cup Fresh Strawberries
1 tbsp Honey
1 tbsp White Sugar
Necronomicon’s Face:
1 tbsp Strawberry Syrup
1 tbsp Chocolate Syrup
1/4 cup Mini Marshmallows
1/4 cup Jumbo Marshmallows
Prepare a 9 x 13 baking pan by lining it with foil.
In a saucepan, heat 1-2 inches of water until simmering. In a separate heat-safe bowl; combine sugar, cocoa powder, salt, and butter. Place bowl above water (the water should not touch the bowl)
Stir mixture regularly with a wooden spoon until butter has fully melted and mixture is warm.
Stir in vanilla. Then add eggs, one at a time, stirring vigorously after each one.
Add flour slowly and thoroughly mix.
Spread mix into prepared baking pan.
To make your strawberry cream cheese from scratch, hull and puree the strawberries. Heat the strawberries and cream cheese in a sauce pan on medium. Add honey and sugar, stirring regularly until reduced to half volume. Allow to cool and mix vigorously. If that’s a little too time consuming for prepping a week night cult meeting snack, go ahead and use 8 oz of pre-made strawberry cream cheese from the grocery store. Yes, the elder gods will judge you, but they’re judging you anyway.
However you acquire it, drop the strawberry cream cheese onto the center of the brownie mix and gently spread over the top leaving a rough edge about an inch from the pan walls.
In a small bowl, mix together approximately 1 tablespoon of strawberry syrup and 1 tablespoon chocolate syrup. Using a basting brush, spread the syrup mix over the cream cheese. Using a toothpick draw out the facial lines and indent areas for the eyes, nose, and mouth. Use extra chocolate syrup sparsely for darker areas and use strawberry syrup generously to fill in each line and carved orifice.
Preheat oven to 325; Bake for 25-30 minutes
Cut 3-4 miniature marshmallows diagonally and then slice each half vertically – for the larger teeth; Cut two more marshmallows this same way but then cut each piece in half again – for smaller teeth; Cut 2 marshmallows vertically half way through – for the eyes
Place marshmallow pieces as desired to design the face.
EDITOR’S NOTE:
If you’d like to make your book bleed when you cut into it, you’ll also want:
1/2 cup strawberry syrup (same stuff you used on top of the brownies)
2 tbsp chocolate syrup
1/2 tsp red food coloring
1 quart sized, food safe plastic bag with a twist-tie top (not a ziplock)
Bake a second pan of brownies with no toppings
Hollow out the second pan of brownies so it’s a mere shell of it’s former self.
Fill the quart bag with the strawberry syrup, chocolate syrup, and red food coloring. Use your hands to mash it around until it’s the color and consistency of dark blood.
Lay it flat inside the hollowed out brownie. Carefully remove as much air as you can and twist-tie it closed. Pad out any extra space with the brownie bits you removed.
Carefully remove the artistically decorated top brownie from it’s mold and lay it atop the hollowed out, blood filled brownie. This makes it look as thick as a book.
Cover the exterior seam with more strawberry cream cheese.
Make sure to use a knife with a very sharp point when you cut into the Necronomicon. Try to aim for the mouth with the first slice so your blood will gush forth from it’s marshmallowy lips.
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Kitchen Overlord’s Minion “Lil Jinni” is a student of informatics and network security, full time mom, and a primary organizer of Vegas 2.0. When not herding hackers and children or contriving shenanigans, she is a guild leader, a Trekkie, a Whovian, a Brown coat, and an Isis agent.
You can stalk her via twitter at: @lil_jinni
